Friends of Wayne

This is a brief intro into the Friends of Wayne Club and why you should want to belong to it.

Anyone who know me knows that when I am going somewhere, I like to get there as fast as possible.  My family knows this about me, and they complain bitterly about my driving, right up until we need to go somewhere, and then they always hand me the keys.  It’s always been that way for me.  Even my father-in-law would ask me to drive any time he was in Dallas and especially when we needed to get to a Dallas Cowboys football game.

One day while following a driver going ten miles below the speed limit in the left lane, otherwise known as the fast lane, I noticed they had a sticker for the church we attended.  My wife Julie notices the sticker and says, “don’t make them mad, they go to our church.”  From this comment was born the “Friends of Wayne” sticker.

If you were a friend of Wayne, I would give you a bumper sticker, and if I spotted the sticker, you gained my instant respect and I would not pass you going really fast or cut you off.  Since I had no convenient way to make or distribute these stickers, it never happened.  However, over the years, several stickers have been added to the Friends of Wayne substitute sticker list.  A sticker from our church, an O.U. sticker of any kind, a sticker my kid’s schools and parking stickers for companies I work for.  The list has grown ever longer but sometimes shorter.  I change jobs, and the company In left drops off.  O.U. stickers never change, but my kid’s schools do.  It is an ever-evolving list I must keep up with.

In honor of true Friends of Wayne, or FOW if you will, I am designing an official sticker just for you.  No longer will you be afforded blanket respect because out kids went to school together.  You will be afforded the respect you deserve for being my friend by simply getting your own FOW sticker.

However, there are a few rules that come with the sticker.  You must follow these rules or risk having your FOW status revoked.  The rules:

  1. The left lane is for passing.  Get in and then get out.  Let the fast drivers pass you.  This is not only a courtesy; it is the law.
  2. No texting and driving.  Seriously, do I need to explain this one?
  3. Always use your turn signal.  Again, it’s the law and it is courteous.
  4. No brake checking anyone, ever.  It is considered road rage to brake check someone.  No matter what this person is doing or has done, do not join in the road rage.  Stay above the fray.
  5. Finally, be courteous and do the right thing. 

Simple rules to follow and to obey, and you too can be a Friend of Wayne.

Read More